The Crimson Codex

Dear Chuckleheads,

Once again I've not posted in a few days. I apologize. NaNoWriMo, real life, and other things getting in the way of blogging. Anyway, I'll keep things short today. I've something to share with you today. It's an erotic flash fiction I wrote a few weeks ago. Well...here we go.

( WARNING. NSFW. CONTAINS RELATIONS OF A SEXUAL NATURE BETWEEN MEN. )
Anyway, I hope you liked that. I'll talk to you soon when I have something more interesting to write about.

~Azrael

Dear Pinheads,

Just a short post for now since I thought it was amusing.

I tried hitting the "Random Journal" button on the LJ front page to find interesting, right? Business as usual. When the page loaded, I found myself upon a Russian LJ. That's fine, sometimes we hit snags like this. No worries. I go to the homepage and hit the "Random Journal" button again, and once again I end up face-to-face with a Russian journal. I repeat the process once more, again with the cyrillic. I was starting to get amused, so I did it a few more times, and each successive time just brought me more Russians. What is this, LJ? Y u no speek eenglesh? xD So, with that off-putting and vaguely offensive comment, I'm off to go do fun things.

Ta-ta!
~Azrael

Interesting question. Who pays on a first date, eh? Honestly, that depends on if you're going dutch, the man is a gentleman, or the woman feels like paying/the man is nothing but a lowdown scumbag douchenozzle.

For the first, usually it's a pretty informal date, but it can be a semi-formal date too. Point is is that both of you end to split the tab. The end.

In the case of the second, the woman finds a nice gentleman and takes him out on a date. All goes well, they have dinner and a movie, or whatever you kids do nowadays for dates. Go clubbin' or whatever the fuck it is. THE POINT IS that usually in this case, the guy saves up, does most of the planning (or all of the planning), and ends up paying for the entire thing.

In the third's case, however, it's either that you get that rare girl who is willing to pay for the entire thing. If it is this type of girl, then WORSHIP THE GROUND SHE WALKS ALL, FOR SHE IS A GODDESS. The flipside of this, however, is that sometimes the girl ends up paying when the guy is nothing but a penniless douche-tractor who makes her pay for everything. Scuzzbucket that he is.

Well, that's that.

Dear pinheads,

Lookie here. New content, just as I promised. Before I get started, perhaps I should take some time to inform you about something. As some of you may already know, and as others may not, I fancy myself a writer. I may say that, but I know I am amateurish, at best. However, that has never stopped me from creating stories. Recently, however, I came upon this lovely group of people, Querk. 

This place is wondrous. Imagine. A group of writers of different ages, different backgrounds, even from different parts of the country, and they are all banding together, learning from each other, improving each other, and in the process, they are also all improving their writing. Unfortunately, I have not been part of this group for very long. In fact, I have only been a part of this delicious clusterfuck of creativity since a few weeks into Nanowrimo. However, we have plans. So many plans. However, since that is not for any of you to know, I shan't bore you with the details.

What I HAVE come to you with, however, is a side-project that has nothing to do with my Nano-novel, but nevertheless is part of my journey of a writer. I have taken up the task of authoring something like a fairy-tale. This in itself is hard enough, since anything can happen in one of these things, and I must also make it diverting and entertaining enough for both children and adults to enjoy. However, my companions at Querk have been nothing but supportive, so I would very much like to take this time to share the first chapter of this particular project of mine. I hope you enjoy.

( Continued... )
Well, there you have it, ladies and gentlemen. I do hope you liked it, and I hope you look forward to the progress of the tale of Prince Lucian as it continues to be written.

And now, as a show of gratitude for even THINKING to read this particular journal entry, I would like to leave you with a song that is stuck in my head. It is from Mozart L'Opera Rock, a French rock opera based on the life of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. The song featured is called Tatoue-Moi. It's actually a REALLY sexual song. Love it.

And now the lyrics. :D Tatoue-moi/Tattoo me.

Well, I suppose that's it for now. I wish all of you buffoons well, and I shall see you again.

~Azrael

Dear incorrigible fools,

  Yes...I'm back. As to how I should feel about this, I am honestly not too sure. I rarely have anything worth saying, hence my 4-year absence from the LJ community. Nevertheless, since I have been writing more, I figure I should use this venue as a way to publish various things that I've been working on. As some of you may or may not know, I am participating in Nanowrimo this year. For the uninitiated, Nanowrimo, short for National Novel Writing Month, is an annual contest that happens every November. During this contest, writers both amateur and professional all work toward writing a 50k word novel by the end of the month. What do you win? Well, for writers, we win the satisfaction of knowing that we have finished the first draft of our novel, new friendships, ideas, etc, while desperately trying not to go insane.

Belaying all that for now, the novel that I'm working on is titled Nox Arcana. It is a grouping of short stories that may be read apart, but are actually part of a larger work that is based around the Arcana Majora of the tarot. So far, I've written 15k+. Not bad, eh? Well, aside from the fact that I've wanted to tear my hair out over the plot several times, am irritated by the fact of how long the first chapter is dragging, am dreading having to chop this work up into separate books, blah blah blah. Oh the joys of being an amateur writer.

Anyway, I'm also writing something else. It's a fairy tale called The Knitting Prince. At the suggestion of a friend I met during this year's Nano, I'm working on it as a sort of side-project. It's about a prince who knits. Go figure, eh? At any rate, I shall probably get down to posting more of my writing later on, when LJ's auto-formatting isn't ruining my mood. Till then, my freaky darlings.

Cheers,
~Azrael

Dear Ne'er-do-Wells,

I am deeply sorry that I have not been posting as regularly as I used to be, and tonight I am far too tired to even THINK of doing so, so I shall just post something very random that I found on someone else's livejournal: my eccentric, aristocratic British title of nobility.

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: His Grace Baron Azrael the Abrupt of Goosnargh on the Carpet Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

Well, as you can see, I am a Baron, and that is just fine by me. Till the time I can finally update with something worth reading, my lovelies. Tata.

~Azrael

Dear Fools,

I suppose I owe you some semblance of an explanation as to why I haven't updated in so long. Well, the main reason is that I have momentarily ran out of topics to lecture about, so I have been taking time out of my schedule to observe the world a little more in order to mayhaps find something of interest, or some deeper life-lesson that I might then divulge to you, my readers. No luck, so far, but I shall keep trying. Please be patient until then.

Another huge reason for my failure to post is that it just became too much for me to update every single day, so momentary hiatuses are needed for rest and recuperation. We all have days like that. Days when you feel like just staying in your bed doing nothing except watching the dust collect on your eyelids. Recently I have felt like that, and in addition to my lack of lectures and interesting subjects to chatter about and my overall contempt and unwillingness to post any actual information about my day-to-day life, entries have been sparse. Once again, I apologize and I ask that you bear with me for a moment longer until everything settles down. Lots of things have been going on all at once over here.

This brings me to my next reason for this absence. I haven't been home recently. Actually, just last week I took a leave of absence from the internet for a camping trip with my mates. A sort of last hurrah to summer. If you are on Gaiaonline, and you read my profile regularly, you'll have known all about this. Also, I now have relatives visiting us all the way from England, so I now must play host, and seeing as how I haven't seen them in QUITE a long time, and how they plan to be with us for several weeks, I cannot be bothered to get onto the computer, as I will probably visiting the California sites with them, showing them around, etc etc. Why, just next week we're taking a roadtrip to Vegas, which I have been anxiously anticipating. We're staying near the Aladdin, so I might be able to meet Criss Angel. If I do, and if I take pictures, I'll post them here, but no promises. Hell, I'm not sure if I'll even get to meet him. Anyhow, that's the long and short of it. Once again, I am very sorry for the lack of posts, and as soon as everything settles and the dust clears, I'll be back in action, lecturing all of you, re-educating all of you and administering my own twisted wisdom to the masses. Thank you for your patience.

~Azrael


Ah yes. By way of an apology, I think I shall post a link to a webcomic that I particularly like here. It's basically a sendup of all dating sims and H-games. If you like H-games and dating sims, or even if you don't, or even if you're just BORED OUTTA YER FEKKIN' GOURD, just give this a read. It's funny. And there's toilet humor. And mucho masturbation. XD It's just gotten started, so there are only about 8-9 strips right now, but they're hella funny. XD
( HH: The H-game Webcomic )


And a video. It's a Rammstein cover by Nina Hagen. For those who want to know, Nina Hagen WAS THE driving force behind Euro-Punk. She's TRES AWESOME and is STILL going strong. Anyway, this is her cover of Rammstein's "Seeman." Enjoy~! x3

Dear Lackwits,

Hello hello again. Your humble narrator and author of this tome, Azrael here. I have returned finally, amidst the lack of pomp and ceremony, and I must apologize for my unexcused absence. You see, things came up, as things are often prone to do. I had to take some time off the computer, and from my journal. Yes...tragic, but I have unfortunately returned. Yes, despite your earnest protests for otherwise, I have returned to dole out some more common sense to the uneducated populace. Well, whatever the case for my absence was, I have returned now. And I do have things to say. I was watching VH1 a few days ago out of boredom, and I forced myself to watch the music video for "Promiscuous." GAG. If you ever require something to give you the need to stab your eardrums out, I highly suggest this song. Well, that is not what I wanted to talk about, actually, but rather a LYRIC from that atrocious excuse for music. It brought to my attention something that I had not pondered on for some time...chivalry.

Here's the dreaded lyric that made me think: "Roses are red, Some diamonds are blue. Chivalry is dead, but you're still kinda cute." Aside from having a hideously half-assed attempt at a proper rhyme scheme, this lyric brought something that has been told to me over and over again back to the forefront of my mind. That singlemost vexing thought is this:

Chivalry is DEAD.

I don't necessarily believe in that tripe, but whatever. I HAVE, however, been noticing a decline in the number of real gentlemen in the world recently, if only because the women of today are NOT interested in us, and would much rather date a jerk, an asshole, a narcissist, or a sexfiend, if only to be abused. Morons. Them, and us. It's girls like that who make me want to stop dating entirely, and it's guys like that that make me utterly ashamed of MY OWN GENDER. Sad, isn't it? To be ashamed of one's own gender? But that is a topic for another discussion.

"Chivalry is dead." Now, as I have said before in this entry, I do not necessarily subscribe to that belief, but current events are leading me to feel otherwise. Did you know that back in Victorian England, or maybe even a little after that, men laid their coats over mud puddles so their ladyfriends would not have to worry about soiling their shoes? People held the door open for each other back then. People CARED what you thought about. Roses were given freely to women by men who did it simply to put a smile on those women's faces. People had CLASS back then. What happened to that time? What happened to class? Good manners? Fine breeding? Why has the world thrown out those values and adopted rudeness and callousness as their new attitudes? Honestly, I blame the media for the current corrupt society, but I'm not getting STARTED on that, else I get COMPLETELY off track and allow this entry to go on too long. Anyway, it seems that rudeness has replaced good manners, and unsensitivity has replaced fine breeding, but what are we to do to change this? It may be too late, and the breed of Gentleman may have already died out. I might even be the last one. So, as much as it pains me to say it, all of you may be right when you say chivalry is dead.

All of you MAY be right, but that does not mean we cannot resurrect chivalry to some small extent. If you hold the door open for someone at least ONCE in a day, or even a week, that's helping bring it back. If you just randomly greet a stranger with a smile occasionally, that helps too. If you give a present to someone just because you feel like it, that's also bringing it back. So...I guess chivalry isn't actually as dead as everyone thinks it is, so FUCK YOU, NELLY FURTADO AND TIMBALAND~!!!!!!!! YOU SHITS ARE WRONG~!!!!!!!!! DEAD WRONG~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well, once again, I thank you for putting up with me and reading this little rant of mine. Till next time, then.

~Azrael

Oh, here's something to make you lot think a little. It's a short by a Czechoslovakian surreal filmmaker called Jan Svankmajer. The short is titled "A Game with Stones," and basically it tells of the genesis, developement, and annihilation of the universe through a strange mechanical game. Enjoy.

Well...you see... Whatever. Take a look for yourself.



I figured. I knew I'd get Muraki. I KNEW IT. Hell, I cosplayed as him enough... =_=;; Well, my real entry shall come later today. Maybe. Look forward to it.

Dear Fools,

Hello again. It is your humble narrator, Azrael. I must apologize for not writing anything yesterday, but circumstances had me at an impasse. So, I shall write today what I had planned to write yesterday, that is, my thoughts on beauty, what is truly beautiful, and society's warped perception of this particular topic. This is probably a rather touchy subject for you all, and I've no doubt that I may make a couple of enemies by writing this, but I also have no doubts that MANY of you will most probably agree for what I'm about to say. Either way suits me. Like I said in my first post, I don't give a damn whether you like me, love me, or think I am just a person who speaks the truth, hate me, despise me, or simply think I am unpleasant... These little discussions and lectures of mine are here for you to think on, and possibly glean some deeper meaning from them. If you don't, that's fine. No skin off my nose.

Now...beauty. What comes to your mind when I say that word? Blue-eyed, blonde haired girls with gigantic tits and waists you can put a hand around? Buff, muscled meat-heads who think with their little shrunken peckers rather with their brains? SAD. PATHETIC. Why is it that society thinks that this is what beauty is? Because the MEDIA is force-feeding it to us, forcing us to believe that we shall only be beautiful if we look like Paris Hilton (Ugh...even TYPING that name makes me want to VOMIT.), or Brad Pitt. Feh. NOT EVERYONE LOOKS LIKE THAT. Nor can everyone EVER look like that, and to think otherwise is sad and stupid. Why, then, have many of us made up our minds that this is what true beauty is? Is it BECAUSE of the media? Is it BECAUSE visions of their interpretations of beauty are force-fed into our psyches on a daily basis? Maybe it's how we were raised. I'm sure that all of you got called ugly at least ONCE during your childhoods. Maybe moreso. So we go looking for things that actually ARE "beautiful." People that others think look "beautiful," and thus we have an impossible thing to aspire to. To look more like Angelina Jolie, or Tom Cruise, or whoever the fuck the people are idolizing nowadays. It's pathetic that because of people's low self-esteems, the media thinks that they can force us to change our views of beauty. The pressing question is, why do we let them? Why do we allow this change to occur? You know, way back when in Victorian London, or even in Civil War America, bigger women were more attractive to men. THAT is why women wore bustles and corsets and layers upon layers of petticoats, so that they could fit in with the aesthetic views of then. Even back THEN people were influenced by their pre/misconception of beauty, and that trend NOTICEABLY goes on till the present. It's not that that influence has changed, it's just that the perception of beauty has changed, and will continue to change. Why, then. would someone be so foolish as to try and be like those people when we KNOW that society's perception of beauty is ever-changing? Aside from being a completely futile task, it's also a COLLOSSAL waste of time, effort, and money.

Now...we have established what society thinks is beautiful, and how the media continues to warp that perception. But what do YOU think is beautiful? I ask this of my precious lost souls, my dear friends, even people who are reading this by accident. If you are a male, think of your ideal female. If you are female, think of your ideal male. I'll give you some time...

Alright. Now if you were a male, I'm sure that your girl had "pantene" hair, legs that went on forever, a nice, shapely butt and some pretty nice, if not outright GIGANTIC, breasts. Sad, men. SAD. Now, I must admit myself of the same fault. I AM sometimes attracted to that particular type of girl, but not all the time. Sometimes I just think that "that type of girl" is a major whore, slut, or whatever. Now, girls. What about your ideal guy? Was he muscly? As handsome as a movie star? Hung like a donkey? UGH. Come on now. That's pathetic. Now, if you are part of the few that did NOT think along these lines, you do have my eternal praise for not being influenced by the media. Why do we think that the aforementioned "types" are attractive? Because we are MADE to think that way, I should wager. Whoever said "beauty is only skin deep" did NOT know the "Plastic Surgery Freaks of Nature" of today. But what about true beauty? Is that only truly skin-deep? What about intelligence? Talent? Personality? Heart? All these things are too esoteric for some, too philosophical to grasp for others, but they are NOT skin deep, and those are BEAUTIFUL qualities.

Now we know that beauty is NOT ALWAYS skin deep, and that clothes do NOT always make the man...but quality of character. Personality. Talent. Because, what if there was a truly beautiful woman before you...but she had NO SUBSTANCE? Same for the girls. What if there was a gorgeous guy that propositioned you for a date, but was as deep as a two-inch rain puddle? How many of you (HORNDOGS NOT INCLUDED) could HONESTLY say that they would even CONSIDER THINKING of going out with them? Or even SLEEPING with them, for that matter? Me? I like a girl with substance. She doesn't necessarily have to be pretty, but she HAS to be at least intelligent enough to keep up with me, she has to be able to make me laugh..and she HAS to be faithful. And SANE. That always helps. Well, I guess that's it for now. Thank you, once again for sticking with me and listening to what I have to say. This concludes tonight's rant. Honestly, this rant could have gone better, but I was strapped for time, and a little lazy. I'll improve on it at a later date.

Oh, to a certain friend of mine? Oh-oh-oooh. Oh-oreo... Oh-oh-oooh. The white stuff. XD YOU know what I mean. XD

~Azrael